This weekend was spent with about 11,000 Christians in the beautiful city of Gatlinburg. I am so glad I got the privilege to spend my weekend with the wonderful group from back home. So many friendships I already had were strengthened and I even made new ones. I wish I had the words to describe just how wonderful it was, but I don't but I am going to try my absolute best.
Friday night we had our first session after traveling all day. We were split up in to 2 sessions and in our session was about 5,000 people. Now I don't know if you have ever heard that many people lift their voice up to Jesus at one time, but I hadn't and I was blown away. It was beyond beautiful to hear so many lift their voices to God. It took all that I had to hold it together and not get overly emotional. I was also sitting next to a man that has been in my life since I was a little girl. I have never heard him sing sitting right next to him and it made my heart happy to hear him lifting up his voice. This man is a very important part of my life. He is like my big brother or my second dad so it was the best to hear him sing. Then comes the lesson presented by a wonderful man of God. Kyle Butt is a phenomenal speaker. His lesson title was "Trust Me." This is a concept that I have a really hard time with. I don't trust people to take care of me all the time. Especially God. I just want to do things my own way and not rely on someone to do it for me. Over and over again I try to do things my own way and it never works. Kyle used the example of a small child that jumps into their fathers arms as long as the father will catch them. They will jump with no problem because in their eyes their father is inhuman kind of and there is no doubt in their young mind that the father will catch them when they jump. God is a father that will never get tired of catching us. As long as we are willing to jump God will be there to catch us when we jump. Trust him. I felt like the lesson he gave was just for me.
The next day we heard 3 more lessons by 3 amazing Godly men. All revolved around trusting the Lord. It was kind of crazy that just what I needed to hear that was exactly what I got this weekend. There was a statement made this weekend that simply stated, "If you do not trust God, it is because you do not fully believe in him." I would love to think that I believe in God. I am baptized Christian. I know that I struggle with my faith. I struggle with letting God sit in the pilots seat instead of the copilots seat. I hate this about myself at times. Another statement that was made that really shook me to my core, "Are you getting this? Are you getting that everything you see is done for you by God. God gave up his son for you. Why wouldn't he do everything else for you. Are you really seeing all the blessings you have in your life?" Sometimes, okay most of the time, I take what God has given me for granted. I know I do not thank him enough or sometimes at all for all the wonderful things he has done for me.
There is no doubt in my mind that God loves me. There is no doubt a God that is able to provide for me. I just need to swallow my pride and give it all to him. All he wants from me is a relationship and to be my God.
